The eggman cometh

Words Shmords

Something I need to stop saying so frequently and randomly:

"Ah! Come on stupid!"

This is always directed at myself and always for some stupid reason such as dropping a piece of paper or forgetting my coffee cup in the break room.

Something that made J crack up and posted at the suggestion of Hunter (background: I sleep with two stuffed cows, one of which I've had since I was three years old [fuck you, I am too still bad ass.]).

ME: "I can't find both my cows so I'm just sleeping with the one."
J:     "No cows."
ME: "Uh huh, usually two cows but tonight just the one. <speaking more to the cow or myself than to J>
          Who are you? Oh, it's old floppy!"
J:     "Old sloppy?"
ME: "Old floppy! We aren't talking about my vagina after all."

Just Dumb

I realized fairly early this morning that my outfit makes no sense. It would have done if I'd had all the pieces I'd planned on but I couldn't find my leggings (I really need to invest in a dozen pairs of black leggings). So, instead of looking cute and fun in black leggings, a black skirt, gray and white striped shirt, and colorful flats, I'm wearing a gray and white stripped shirt, black skirt, nicer black tights, and boots that are a bit much for this outfit. I should have worn a different shirt or a different pair of shoes or just worn black trousers instead. But evidently, I was dedicated to the idea of this outfit. That or I was so fucking cold that I didn't care to think too hard. Seriously, my bedroom is frigid. I finally got around to emailing my apartment complex about insulating the AC unit so hopefully, when I get home today there will be a ghetto plastic sheet masking taped around the fucker.

Sugar, Sugar!

Whilst I am at the moment convinced that I'm hungry all the time on this detox, I'm pretty sure it is just because I'm not eating enough* and I am getting a hell of a lot done. Yesterday I was stunned at how productive I was what with the diligent work day, 3.5 mile run at the gym, trip to the grocery store, cooking, washing dishes, and doing laundry. That may not seem like a lot but compared to my usual work day followed by lots and lots of couch time, it's pretty major. Hell, I wasn't even planning on doing laundry last night, it just sort of happened. Maybe today I'll accidentally vacuum or wipe down every surface. Who knows? The sky is the limit! And being productive is certainly more rewarding than plowing through my DVR'd show list whilst drinking and stuffing myself with chips. I dare say I feel pretty good right now. I even texted my friend, KR, to thank her for getting me into it because I'm really looking forward to the results and I feel good knowing that I'm actually doing something good for my health. I'm sure I'll end up freebasing black tar heroin by the end of the day so I'll just enjoy this moment while it lasts.

*Definitely a matter of not eating enough as evidenced by a conversation with Birdy here at work in which I said "maybe tomorrow I'll have two hard boiled eggs for breakfast instead of just one." I've been at work for five hours and so far I've eaten one egg, a few pieces of cheese, a green apple, and, just now, a chicken breast I cooked the other day. I'm not exactly eating meals, am I?