Domesticity and Waxing

Warning: This post contains what is popularly referred to as TMI so you may want to skip the first part of this post. Especially if you are my brother. If you want to skip it, just scroll down to the second set of asterisk marks.

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I began getting Brazilian waxes a couple of months ago because I was tired of ingrown hairs and the pain that is shaving my own lady garden. I go to the same place every time because they are nearby and I don't need everyone checking out my bits and pieces. The first few times I got the same girl but this latest time I got a new one. I was kind of relieved because usual girl is chatty. I don't like talking to the person cutting my hair and I read when I get a pedicure. So I really do not feel like chatting whilst you are moving my labia here and there and spreading hot wax on me. As I said, I was relieved. This new girl wasn't a chatter but I felt like she was only a few moves away from giving me a complete gynecological exam. I almost laughed because it was kind of funny the way she'd move this lip back and then move my legs around to make sure she got all the hair. But it was just, well, odd. I believe she is what you'd call a perfectionist. 

My favorite part? When she had me get on my hands and knees so she could wax my crack. She asked if I was comfortable and I said yes while chortling on the inside because I was basically in doggy style, a position I am definitely familiar with. But I preferred that to what the usual girl does, which is to have me lay on my stomach and spread my cheeks with my hands. 

Now do you understand why I go to the same place all the time? Yeah. And for those who are scared of the Brazilian but who kind of want to try it, go for it. It isn't that painful at all (using tweezers to pluck your eyebrows hurts worse). And at least at my place, the people apply a numbing agent and offer you wine if you want (or coffee or water or some sort of juice). I was not expecting the backside waxing so that was a surprise and I'll let you know that yes, you do feel it when it's over with. Apparently that hair back there does something or just fills a gap because you definitely feel the difference. (Quick note about my use of the terms "crack" and "backside". You all know I'm not a prude and I use foul language but to say she waxed my asshole would not be correct as no wax was poured into me and then ripped out. That is also why I hate when women talk about having their vaginas waxed. No, you are having your pubis mons and labia waxed. Learn your anatomy people). 

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Other than the above, I had a relaxing weekend of watching the Albert Campion series whilst folding laundry and ironing a bit. I was really rather domestic with that shit. And today I will be cooking Polynesian chicken and this potato thing where you basically slice the potatoes almost all the way and put stuff on them and bake them. The Polynesian chicken is really easy and shouldn't take much labor on my part. Or else it wouldn't if I'd gotten the right ingredients. You use chicken pieces; I bought chicken breasts. So I am going to have to cut it all up into pieces. You also use crushed pineapple and peach preserves; I bought pineapple chunks and canned peaches so I had to go back to the store. I didn't buy the pineapple because I figure I can crush the ones I have. And the potato thing really is super simple and, happily, the oven temperatures are pretty much the same so I can throw the whole thing in at the same time. Score!

Why the domesticity? Well, when the Bat does laundry he leaves it on the sofa which means clutter and wrinkles. It bothered me so I folded it and ironed things and put it away and finished doing the rest of what he started and did some towels. As to the cooking, the Bat has decided that now that Monkey will be going back to school, we should all cook twice a week. I picked Sunday and will figure out what other night I want. But if the other two don't cook as well, I'll quit. I think it is a great idea because we will all eat better and it will help get everyone back into a routine. Speaking of which, I think mine might be off this week because I usually do Girl Date Night on Tuesdays but Spectero and I have a mutual friend whose birthday is Wednesday so we'll both prob go to that and I don't know if she'll want to do two nights cause of the money. Wednesday is also date night but, as I've said in recent posts, I don't think the Bat is really that into it so I don't know if we are going to continue with that. Which is a bummer for me but what can you do. 

For the rest of my day, I'm going to organize my room and hang a mirror so I can get ready in there rather than the Bat's bathroom (I want to get up earlier for work but don't want to disturb his sleep). I will also find another esoteric mystery series to watch. Back to the grind tomorrow for what I believe will be a stressful week. But, my friends, it will also be a short week for yours truly as I have Friday off and do not return to work until the following Wednesday. So take that stressy work. 

Here's to everyone having a great work week.