Maybe I am being blind or setting myself up for disappointment but I feel like we are making good progress and am more confident that this will all work out. It will take time but we are talking and listening to one another. We aren't yelling at each other. He gets defensive and angry at first but that is because he's worried I'm blaming him or attacking him. More importantly, he controls himself and calms quickly when I explain things and that means he's listening and hearing me. And I'm hearing him. I was surprised by some things but, in retrospect, I see where he is coming from. This is good because it means I can recognize the negative behaviors and so can identify them in the future and modify my behaviors into healthy ones.

But the point is, we are both receptive to one another and that means we are not at the point where we would need counseling to deal with one another. And it means we are both in this to put in the work.

We are taking today and tomorrow off, planning to meet up on Thursday. During this time we are to think about what we need from one another and what things came up to bring us to this point.  And we'll discuss them and, hopefully, deal with them.

The point is that I have hope. I am scared and will be unless or until we work out. But I feel more confident about our relationship and about our love than I have done in a very long time. I know that sounds bizarre because he is out of the house, but we are finally being candid and honest and that is what we need.