They have a cream for that
Why yes, that was quite exciting, was it not? Lions, grizzly bears, Bengal tigers, monkeys (some with herpes, some without), and wolves were running amuck in eastern Ohio. Both a friend in New Jersey and my mother asked me if it was anywhere near my place (no) and did I have to dodge large animals on my way to work that morning (no, but I did have to drive through pouring rain). At first I didn't even know what my friend was talking about. I was running late for work and my radio station was finishing up a fund raiser so news was sparse. Getting the details from someone in NJ was funny because I took it as "animals escaped from the zoo and ate the zoo keeper!" In actuality, this weird guy with 70+ acres of land collected all sorts of animals, had a rotten life, got angry and/or depressed, let the animals out of their cages (and even cut the fencing to ensure they could not be returned) and then shot himself. I wonder if he would have done it if he'd known that most of them would have been killed.
That is some crazy shit though, isn't it? And the media really seems to enjoy carting out that picture of a dead lion. Really? I think the only good thing that has come from this, other than the fact that Ohio now has to start talking about regulations on owning 'exotic animals' is the phrase: "...a monkey, infected with herpes B virus, was found to have been eaten by one of the large cats..." Oh come on! Tell me that isn't kind of hilarious. A herpes monkey was feared to be on the loose and he'd forgotten his Valtrex! Men, women, and children were at risk of getting monkey herpes! But large cat to the rescue because it ate herpes monkey! Phew! How the fuck do you know if a monkey has herpes? Did it have a cold sore or raised sores on its bathing suit area? Does the large cat automatically have monkey herpes now? Is monkey herpes the new AIDs?
Get Low
There was a (non) issue at work regarding the coffee supply. Someone emailed EA that we were totally out but EA had taken a vacation day so she called me. I called the supplier and notified the office that things were under control. I then had three separate requests that I ask the supplier to refresh our stock of Sweet n' Low. Really? Sweet n' Low? It's that popular? I mean, whatever, I know it doesn't have to carry the cancer warning any more but is it just me or is it a little weird that it is so popular? It's like having people request that our vending machine start carrying Tab or Diet Rite.
The Boss
In other work news, I was supposed to get a day without my boss but it fell through. You would have thought someone took away a day's pay or a cherished pony given how pissed off upset I became. He was scheduled to fly out to a satellite office in order to attend a meeting but the meeting was canceled at the last minute. I stomped around the office and went up to people saying things like "I was owed this day! I was freaking owed this time away from the man!" But I'm off on Monday so I'll take what I can get. Why do I dislike my boss so much? Because he isn't a good manager, he pushes as much of his responsibility onto me as possible, and the one time I broached the concept of changing my title and pay grade given a recent project I'd taken over, he did not respond and, instead, undercut me in the next two emails I received (with others copied) and in a third that was just to me. He wants to play and chat when I have work to do, he fails to communicate things to me and then tells me that he did and I just forgot, and he doesn't take things seriously. He also has a tremendous chip on his shoulder from having been demoted, not taking any responsibility whatsoever. He's pretentious and pompous, hypocritical, arrogant, and summons me by yelling for me from his office like I'm a dog. It is too much for him to pick up his phone and dial my four digit extension. That's why I dislike my boss. I should never have applied for my present job and I regret it fairly frequently. That being said, I bitched and moaned in my former position and every so often I remember that the grass is always greener and I would be miserable if I still had my former colleague. I make decent money, I'm mostly independent in my day, and it was a step up. I just thought I'd explain why it is I bitch about the man so much.
I have a certain amount of vague guilt because most people that know me are well aware of my utter disdain for my boss. So much so, in fact, that I sometimes wonder if he is aware of it on some level. It has been almost a year of being summoned by his yelling from his office and that shit got old pretty quickly. I don't know why I didn't ask him to stop it but there you go. These days it is fairly common for me to mutter "mother fucker" before saying "yes sir" and getting up and walking over. But whenever I'm talking to people and he somehow comes up in the conversation, my entire affect changes and rarely will you hear anything positive from me. So they know, my office mates, they know. Maybe that is why my attitude has gotten progressively worse lately.
No more of that
To end on a positive note, I am going to a Halloween party tomorrow. At a pub! I'm going as a nun and the costume is shorter than I thought so I have to get stockings. Happily, the shortness is the only slutty thing about it, the rest of it being all high collar and long sleeves. There is even a habit. Hopefully I'll look cute and not awful.
And, even more exciting, I have an interesting keyword search that led someone to this blog: "My psychiatrist loves to suck my dick". Who the hell searches something like that?!?!?!?!
Why yes, that was quite exciting, was it not? Lions, grizzly bears, Bengal tigers, monkeys (some with herpes, some without), and wolves were running amuck in eastern Ohio. Both a friend in New Jersey and my mother asked me if it was anywhere near my place (no) and did I have to dodge large animals on my way to work that morning (no, but I did have to drive through pouring rain). At first I didn't even know what my friend was talking about. I was running late for work and my radio station was finishing up a fund raiser so news was sparse. Getting the details from someone in NJ was funny because I took it as "animals escaped from the zoo and ate the zoo keeper!" In actuality, this weird guy with 70+ acres of land collected all sorts of animals, had a rotten life, got angry and/or depressed, let the animals out of their cages (and even cut the fencing to ensure they could not be returned) and then shot himself. I wonder if he would have done it if he'd known that most of them would have been killed.
That is some crazy shit though, isn't it? And the media really seems to enjoy carting out that picture of a dead lion. Really? I think the only good thing that has come from this, other than the fact that Ohio now has to start talking about regulations on owning 'exotic animals' is the phrase: "...a monkey, infected with herpes B virus, was found to have been eaten by one of the large cats..." Oh come on! Tell me that isn't kind of hilarious. A herpes monkey was feared to be on the loose and he'd forgotten his Valtrex! Men, women, and children were at risk of getting monkey herpes! But large cat to the rescue because it ate herpes monkey! Phew! How the fuck do you know if a monkey has herpes? Did it have a cold sore or raised sores on its bathing suit area? Does the large cat automatically have monkey herpes now? Is monkey herpes the new AIDs?
Get Low
There was a (non) issue at work regarding the coffee supply. Someone emailed EA that we were totally out but EA had taken a vacation day so she called me. I called the supplier and notified the office that things were under control. I then had three separate requests that I ask the supplier to refresh our stock of Sweet n' Low. Really? Sweet n' Low? It's that popular? I mean, whatever, I know it doesn't have to carry the cancer warning any more but is it just me or is it a little weird that it is so popular? It's like having people request that our vending machine start carrying Tab or Diet Rite.
The Boss
In other work news, I was supposed to get a day without my boss but it fell through. You would have thought someone took away a day's pay or a cherished pony given how pissed off upset I became. He was scheduled to fly out to a satellite office in order to attend a meeting but the meeting was canceled at the last minute. I stomped around the office and went up to people saying things like "I was owed this day! I was freaking owed this time away from the man!" But I'm off on Monday so I'll take what I can get. Why do I dislike my boss so much? Because he isn't a good manager, he pushes as much of his responsibility onto me as possible, and the one time I broached the concept of changing my title and pay grade given a recent project I'd taken over, he did not respond and, instead, undercut me in the next two emails I received (with others copied) and in a third that was just to me. He wants to play and chat when I have work to do, he fails to communicate things to me and then tells me that he did and I just forgot, and he doesn't take things seriously. He also has a tremendous chip on his shoulder from having been demoted, not taking any responsibility whatsoever. He's pretentious and pompous, hypocritical, arrogant, and summons me by yelling for me from his office like I'm a dog. It is too much for him to pick up his phone and dial my four digit extension. That's why I dislike my boss. I should never have applied for my present job and I regret it fairly frequently. That being said, I bitched and moaned in my former position and every so often I remember that the grass is always greener and I would be miserable if I still had my former colleague. I make decent money, I'm mostly independent in my day, and it was a step up. I just thought I'd explain why it is I bitch about the man so much.
I have a certain amount of vague guilt because most people that know me are well aware of my utter disdain for my boss. So much so, in fact, that I sometimes wonder if he is aware of it on some level. It has been almost a year of being summoned by his yelling from his office and that shit got old pretty quickly. I don't know why I didn't ask him to stop it but there you go. These days it is fairly common for me to mutter "mother fucker" before saying "yes sir" and getting up and walking over. But whenever I'm talking to people and he somehow comes up in the conversation, my entire affect changes and rarely will you hear anything positive from me. So they know, my office mates, they know. Maybe that is why my attitude has gotten progressively worse lately.
No more of that
To end on a positive note, I am going to a Halloween party tomorrow. At a pub! I'm going as a nun and the costume is shorter than I thought so I have to get stockings. Happily, the shortness is the only slutty thing about it, the rest of it being all high collar and long sleeves. There is even a habit. Hopefully I'll look cute and not awful.
And, even more exciting, I have an interesting keyword search that led someone to this blog: "My psychiatrist loves to suck my dick". Who the hell searches something like that?!?!?!?!
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