Victories and Failures of Last Night
Victory Managed to go beyond a string cheese and glass of wine and eat something sort of adulty. OK, so this is technically a snack, I think, but I ate two packages so that makes it a meal in my book. And I had lots of ice water, something I don't usually do at home but am getting better about (see: my diet soda addiction).Failure Unsuccessfully tried to argue with a friend's sister who is encouraging said friend's spending habits this week. Sounds like it is none of my business of course, but oh, if you only knew. And my point, in my mind, is very valid. My friend is spending money and buying things for another friend (the two became close about six[?] months ago) and my contention is that friend A's sister should be a bit wary and suspicious of the sudden spending on mystery friend B. After all, friend B may be taking advantage of friend A. This isn't the case (I know friend B very well) but seriously? My family and friends would not be so readily accepting of such behavior. Read a couple columns of Dear Abby to see how awful people are and then maybe you'll have a healthy level of suspicion and cynicism. Or is that an east coast thing?
Victory Managed to fall asleep by midnight. Hurrah! Not being able to fall asleep at night has gotten really old, especially when I've given myself a goal of getting out of bed by 6:45. I've discovered that if I play music, whale sounds, or thunderstorm ambient sound from my iPod, I can drift off relatively easily. That is, if I can keep myself from checking email and Facebook and if I am careful about what music I'm playing (the other night I had a playlist of the Cranberries and "Salvation" came on and scared me/jerked me awake).
Failure Woke up a bunch of times in the middle of the night. This sleep nonsense has to stop and I'm hoping Provigil will help sort me out. I took my first (half) dose this morning and so far I don't feel anything untoward, though I may be blinking more than usual.
Update on Goals for this Week
6:45 a.m. - This goal I'm keeping because I've done it two days in a row and it actually makes me feel better to have some time in the morning (albeit not very much time) rather than just running around like a maniac. Granted, I was still four minutes late to work today but at least I look like I put some effort into my appearance (contacts in, bracelets on). In fact, I feel pretty badass because I'm wearing a pair of new jeans and that always makes me feel badass (though I'm certain I look like a different type of ass; please see dinner from last night as described above). So I may even up the ante and aim for a 6:30 wake up. Stay tuned! **UPDATE** I might feel like a badass in new jeans, but MY GOD I am wearing the WORST shirt ever. It is super unflattering and I've been self-conscious from the moment I realized it has me looking like a linebacker. Needless to say, it is going to be ripped from my body the moment I walk through my apartment door and thrown into the trash.
Swearing - Yeah, who am I kidding? As my friend's sister pointed out, I might want to just stick with one goal a week because my swearing seems unstoppable. Again, I am trying to be better about it in the office, but in emails to friends and on the phone (which I actually use these days), I'm just, well, awful. And like I said, this isn't something that is necessarily harmful, especially if I can keep it out of my professional life, so I'm not taking this failure that badly. Actually, the bright side is that someone once told me that swearing makes a girl really unattractive and given certain odd things that have happened to me lately (someone flipped for me, a stranger hit on me, and an old friend lusted after my feet), this might be a really good thing.
Finally
What is with the prolific posting lately? Do I have any sort of job/life at all anymore? Also, this needs some color so here is a picture:
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