I'm giving myself two goals for this week. The first is to get my ass out of bed before 7 a.m. I have a really bad habit of not getting up until 7:20, all because I know I can make a mad dash and be ready to go by 7:40, the absolute latest I can leave my apartment and still be relatively close on time for work. The really stupid thing is that I am frequently awake by 6:00 or 6:30 and just keep hitting snooze without actually snoozing. But I don't feel like getting up and I certainly don't feel like going to work so I delay it for as long as possible. And this is a new thing. I used to be such a good little morning person. So when I look like hell in the office and like I don't care about my appearance, staff should just realize that I care way more about sleep and being in my comfy bed. But starting tomorrow, I'm getting up no later than 6:45 a.m.
The second is to curb my filthy, awful, vulgar, mouth. Swearing is fine and not really detrimental to the health and well being of anyone, but I think there should be a limit. I have the worst mouth of anyone I know and I'm getting a bit self conscious when people look taken aback after I've casually used the terms 'fuck', 'mother fucker', 'cunt', and 'pussy' (the latter two words are generally used to characterize a person, not as descriptors for the old girl). I mean, really? When I come back to my desk and see the voice mail light flashing, should "mother fucker!" really be my response? It's a voice mail, not a mug of coffee spilled on my computer or a telegram from the war department. The worst that is going to happen is I'm going to have to talk on the phone. And when I mistype something, "god damn it" probably isn't necessary, especially since I have both a 'backspace' and 'delete' key on my keyboard. I think, though, that if 'god damn it' was the worst I used, I wouldn't be developing this complex. But "jesus fucking christ", in an office filled with religious and older people, is really not par for the course. And when is the 'f word' ever office appropriate? I went to lunch with one of our (many) vice presidents recently and, as I was driving to the restaurant, he commented that he now knew something about me. I think he used the words "you have such a sailor mouth". Fortunately, he was cool and down with it and so I wasn't in trouble. But really, Cat? You're going out to lunch with someone from the office and you don't remember to curb your god damned mouth?
So those are two things* I'm going tohalfheartedly attempt to work on hopefully achieve all in the name of self-improvement. I'm not sure how successful I'll be because really, when you impose this sort of thing on yourself, what are the consequences? If I don't get up before 7:00 a.m., I'll just look like shit in the office, again. If I keep swearing like I'm trying to fit in with a couple of truckers, what will happen? I mean, I have a foul mouth but I do keep it to myself frequently (when I curse at my desk I'm usually pretty quiet). Actually, I suppose the mouth could really get me in trouble so maybe I will mend my ways. But I have a feeling I will just unleash it on the internet instead, where I can revel in those naughty words that make a girl so unattractive.
*I should note that I considered giving myself a third goal, one of 'eat a piece of fruit everyday'; however, I was eating an apple as I typed this post and realized that was simply aiming far too high. By the time I was done with the thing, I felt sick, annoyed, and cranky because what I really wanted was crackers, not an apple. And as I've commented before, apples turn into laborious feats for me.
The second is to curb my filthy, awful, vulgar, mouth. Swearing is fine and not really detrimental to the health and well being of anyone, but I think there should be a limit. I have the worst mouth of anyone I know and I'm getting a bit self conscious when people look taken aback after I've casually used the terms 'fuck', 'mother fucker', 'cunt', and 'pussy' (the latter two words are generally used to characterize a person, not as descriptors for the old girl). I mean, really? When I come back to my desk and see the voice mail light flashing, should "mother fucker!" really be my response? It's a voice mail, not a mug of coffee spilled on my computer or a telegram from the war department. The worst that is going to happen is I'm going to have to talk on the phone. And when I mistype something, "god damn it" probably isn't necessary, especially since I have both a 'backspace' and 'delete' key on my keyboard. I think, though, that if 'god damn it' was the worst I used, I wouldn't be developing this complex. But "jesus fucking christ", in an office filled with religious and older people, is really not par for the course. And when is the 'f word' ever office appropriate? I went to lunch with one of our (many) vice presidents recently and, as I was driving to the restaurant, he commented that he now knew something about me. I think he used the words "you have such a sailor mouth". Fortunately, he was cool and down with it and so I wasn't in trouble. But really, Cat? You're going out to lunch with someone from the office and you don't remember to curb your god damned mouth?
So those are two things* I'm going to
*I should note that I considered giving myself a third goal, one of 'eat a piece of fruit everyday'; however, I was eating an apple as I typed this post and realized that was simply aiming far too high. By the time I was done with the thing, I felt sick, annoyed, and cranky because what I really wanted was crackers, not an apple. And as I've commented before, apples turn into laborious feats for me.
We just hired a guy from the construction industry, and he claims that he's never heard the word "fuck" and "motherfucker" more than he hears it at my company. You'd fit right in.
ReplyDeleteLol, the guy I had lunch with said it made him more comfortable and that the women where he lives all have trucker mouths.
ReplyDelete