Sandwich Post - Annoyances, Randomness, and Giggles

Trivial Things I Don't Care About

1. Cutesy/quirky news stories. If I see a headline such as "Monks brew beer to keep abby open", I immediately roll my eyes and just think "nope."  I don't know why, but these fluffy pieces that are meant to give us a break from the horror stories just don't do a thing for me. 
2. The mommy wars. I'm impressed that there is still controversy between working mothers and stay at home mothers but who gives a shit? Mind your own business bitches and quit worrying about what the other team does/feels.
3. Soccer. Suddenly Americans give a shit because the World Cup happened/is happening? No, I get it, some really do love the sport and follow it every year but I'm tired of seeing it playing in bars because NO1CURR really. It's like being in Ohio when the Winter Olympics come on and suddenly people are talking about curling. Why aren't you talking about curling every year if you love it so much? 
4. Summer Blockbuster Movies. I've never cared. I like movies and watch my fair share but I don't cream my pants over the release of the latest super hero movie. Also, there are far too many sequels of certain franchises (I'm eyeballing you Fast and the Furious). 
5. Summer. I like that the days are longer but I never understand why adults who are not teachers get excited about the summer. It's hot and gross and we still have to keep going to work. As a matter of fact, if you are a home owner/dweller, you have more work because you have to attend to your yard(s). 

Little Orphan Simply
One of the things that is very different between me and the Bat is family. He is very family oriented and takes his role as eldest brother very seriously. Being a father is also a huge part of his identity. I think it is lovely and I'm glad that he is close to his family and cares for them and likes engaging with them etc. What he doesn't seem to understand is that it is perfectly OK that I'm not from a close knit clan and that I'm fine with it. My brothers and I like each other well enough and wish one another the best but we don't keep in touch and we don't see each other. And I'm 100% cool with that. I have to assume they are as well because they don't reach out any more than I do. The Bat and I were talking about this last night and I swear I could feel him either judging me, feeling bad for me, or just not believing me when I said I was fine with it. It was funny because I spent a great deal of my life not realizing that my circumstances were the weird ones, not those of my friends. "You have two parents who are divorced and you have a relationship with both of them?" "Your divorced mother/father is dating?!" "You and your brother are friends now? What the fuck?" So yeah, when I was younger I acted and thought based on my situation and what I knew and it took me awhile to realize that I was the odd one with regards to the people I knew.

I'm not an anomaly though. There are plenty of people who have families they aren't close to and who make families out of those who do not share blood. There are people like me who understand that you do not need to have come out of the same vagina in order to be considered family. I keep in regular contact with girlfriends and have done so for years. I have people I connect with and who I would like to visit and who I consider my family. They just happen to not be related to me. I don't understand what is sad about not having a close knit clan or not rushing to visit family when they are back in the states. The Bat said he would jump at the chance to go to Arizona in my place in order to visit with his nieces if he had a brother who lived over seas. I just looked at him and said "those kids are never going to know me so why bother?" It's not like they are going to remember that summer when they were five and two when Fraenka Simply came out to visit. And if my brother cared enough about having visits with me, he would have flown out to see me a couple of times all those years we lived in the same country. He has his own life to live and so do I. We are both fine with the occasional asinine Facebook post.

So I told the Bat that I would try not to talk about anyone in my family other than my mom and he should just try to pretend that she's the only family I have. I think that will make it easier for both of us.

Trivial Things that Make Me Giggle

1. The way the view out of my office window makes it seem like I am high up on a hill or mountain. I'm not. I'm on the first floor but my chair and desk are so low that the bushes and crepe myrtle trees give the appearance of being lower than me. 
2. The way my coworker fucks with the newest member of the team. Well, fucked with I should say. When he first started, my coworker El Salvador would tell him things like "as the newest member of the team, you have to bring us breakfast on Fridays." She would really push it too. His first Friday, the new guy brought us bagels and we all had to back pedal and apologize and tell him she was just messing with him. He knew it, he was just being nice. 
3. The way Bubbles runs. I don't know if it was Trucker or his brother but one of them commented that she runs funny. I defended her but I already knew that. I can't even explain it but she does run funny. I also get tickled every time she slides by accident. 
4. The way the Bat laughs when he finds something really, really funny. Not just your run of the mill funny laugh, but laugh at something hysterical. It is rare and it sounds funny and it tickles me greatly