Trading Down

So, now that I've totally burned bridges with the Bat, I can talk about something that helped me get over the whole "he told me he wasn't going to date or start things while I was in his house and then he started things while I was not only in his house but he was fucking me" thing.

Some girls do this. I'm not going to say we all do as I've never done it before, but some do. BFF and I looked up his new girlfriend's Facebook and we seriously thought it must be a joke. So here are some details about the Bat's newest sex toy.

1. She has a really cute one year old.
2. She is in her late twenties.
3. She was recently let off probation and so is no longer a felon (birds of a feather).
4. She fucking loves weed man.
5. She has bad tattoos.
6. She likes anything with a rose on it because that is her middle name.
7. She spent about three years as an independent wrestler and is now a dog groomer.
8. She likes skin tight, loudly patterned dresses when she goes out.
9. She lives with family (she only moved to Texas in August so maybe she's just trying to get on her feet).
10. She didn't mind that a guy was setting up a relationship with her whilst he was fucking his ex girlfriend who lived with him.
11. She uses the term "hun".
12. She was married in either March of this year or last year but I guess that didn't stick. I'm not holding that against her but dude, if it was this year, kind of early isn't it? But different strokes for different folks.

I honestly think this will be a good relationship for the Bat. He will either be smarter than her or on par with her intelligence and he used to get weirdly defensive at odd times with me. Sorry, I'm smart and I'm not going to dumb myself down. They both love weed. They both have sordid pasts. Neither pursued higher education (which is fine). They both have questionable morals when it comes to sexual relationships. They clearly have the same level of respect for women. Neither is very ambitious or career oriented (again, totally fine). The only troubling issue is the tattoos because the Bat does not like tattoos. But I'm sure they can smoke a bowl and he'll get over it. Oh, and she, too, is originally from California.

Now, I'm not a super model and I'm not perfect but here is what I brought:

1. No criminal record.
2. I have a grown up job with a 401K.
3. No trashy tattoos.
4. I'm smart enough to make my Facebook page private (cause if ex girlfriends can find you, potential employers can too)
5. I may dress poorly (well, that's behind me) but you would never call my taste trashy (cause elderly/frumpy is so much better).
6. I'm a smart girl and I have a BA which means I have ambition.
7. I am very driven in my work.
8. I own TWO cars (OK, that actually sucks and someone needs to buy one of these).
9. No criminal record.
10. I can afford to live on my own and am just gnawing at the bit to get the fuck out of here.
11. I have standards and will not mess with a guy who is messing with another girl, I don't care if they are together, friends with benefits or what.

So I have nothing against this girl other than her not giving a shit that the Bat was fucking someone and setting shit up with her but let's face it, if you could medal in trading down, the Bat got the fucking gold.

I think these two will be happy together and that is all that matters. I don't really care what happens to the Bat although I certainly do not wish him ill in any way since he has a kid and a family that loves him. If this is what he is into, go for it. But honestly, both BFF and I have thought "is this a joke" and "this must just be a sexual relationship set up because really?"

And yes, if it had turned out that new girlfriend was super hot and accomplished, I would be feeling like shit. Who knew I'd actually come out feeling better? For one, he is a lying, hypocritical, hurtful on purpose piece of shit. For two, I'm kind of embarrassed that I spent a year with this guy given his taste.