Thank goodness that's over with

I was a nicer version of myself yesterday, wishing friends and family "Merry Christmas" and even sending out a generic "Happy Christmas" on Facebook just to avoid being a total asshole. Don't get me wrong, whilst I abhor religion, want no part of it, and despise the way people won't let me be about that, I do not hate the religious.  J may be the only atheist friend I actually have. With the exception of Spark Plug, my Muslim convert college friend, all my friends seem to be Christian. So is my mother. I think my eldest brother may be agnostic but when you haven't really had a relationship in over a decade, does it really matter? So yeah, I fucking hate religion and am irritated as fuck when people wish me "Merry Christmas" all willy nilly; I hate it more when people wish me "Merry Christmas" when they know I am an atheist (this does not apply to close friends but to acquaintances*).  But I try not to be a dick because I know I'm in the minority so I was a sweet girl and was all sunshine and light and didn't say anything inflammatory to any of my friends. Special thanks to the one who wished me a "happy fourth Sunday of the month."

*My close friends fuck up and send me cards saying "Merry Christmas" or send me presents but it is totally absent-minded and that's fine because I know they aren't praying over the cards or gifts with the hope that sweet baby Jesus will hug my heart and save me. But if you've only known me a few weeks or months and you have been told I'm an atheist, I take exception because I would think you would be more careful about that shit. I don't care if it is part of your culture or your way of life; my way of life is to full on swear at you and tell you just what I think of your beliefs. But I understand that isn't what you are into so I'm mother fucking polite and well mannered, biatch.

Thank goodness that's over though, right? No more awful songs played round the clock, no more of that terrible Christmas scent that they seem to spray all over. No more forced and faked good will. I do like that people give to charity a lot this time of year but it also irritates me that it is made into a big deal around Christmas and then seemingly forgotten about the rest of the year. I also don't like that I end up giving all of my cash to the Salvation Army just because I go to the grocery store every freaking day and feel guilty if I pass that bell ringer without slipping his metal bucket a dollar. But mainly, this time of year feels like a mine field with my having to side step offending others, bury the offense I feel, and basically try, for once, to not be an asshole. 

Now we can all focus on New Year's, the raddest holiday of the year when we all get wasted on booze and hopes of being better people in the next year. I know now everyone does the resolution thing or even the drunk thing but that is something I can get on board with. People filled with artificial good cheer brought on by copious libations and hope laying warm like a blanket tucked around everyone's shoulders. Every year a fresh start, something so many of us desire. A new year to not be a pussy, a prick, a sissy, a sloth. Hope is a like a drug or an orgasm or a spin of the roulette wheel. You let it build up inside of you until you are filled to bursting and you take your chance. Maybe your hopes will be realized in some form or maybe they will be completely dashed. But it is intoxicating when you let it take you over so intensely for a brief moment of time. And having something to look forward to, no matter how minor, is what keeps some of us moving one foot in front of the other, even if it is just hope of something better.

I'll take that over an obese man with bad fashion sense and bits of food in his facial hair any day.

Hitchens

Reminder: On 12/29 I will have a new domain name. Please email me with your location (geographical) at CET1980@live.com if you want the new address.

Christopher Hitchens died today and I was surprisingly shocked. I was saddened, of course, but I shouldn't have been shocked given his diagnosis. I feel a bit fake for how upset I am seeing as I've never read a book he's written. But I loved that man for his Vanity Fair contributions, his awesome personality, and his public voice of atheism. I did borrow God is Not Great from the library once but I had to return it before I had a chance to read it. But you only have to read a few articles of his to know that he was a brilliant man with tremendous wit and great intelligence. I never did agree with all of his beliefs but if I only liked and admired those who shared my every opinion, my life would not be as rich as it is. Hitchens was one of a kind and I'm going to miss him. I'm going to make up for lost time by starting with his autobiography and going backwards.

My atheism is something I take incredibly seriously, to the point that the general manager of my company once commented, negatively, that I'm awfully sensitive about it. But every year I have people wish me a happy holiday or merry Christmas and I find the hubris of assuming that I'm Christian revolting. Why? Because if I just randomly spouted off to my coworkers that believing in a supernatural being who gives a shit about us and made this world is ridiculous, I'd get into major trouble. I've had people sneer at me and make jokes about how I should have to work on Christmas since I have stupid beliefs. I can't do the same back without sanctions. My first year at the company I work for, I took part in all of the holiday shit because I didn't know how long I'd be there and didn't want to be that weird temp. But I've long since let people know I'm an atheist and that I don't take part. They still try to explain that the holiday party isn't about religion and act like I'm making much ado about nothing by not taking part. They do not do this to the Jehovah's Witness we work with.

I don't believe in any god, soul, afterlife, etc. These are beliefs, regardless of what you want to say. To those that say "well then how did we get here?" I say "do you answer all questions to which you don't have the answer with 'God did it'?" And I sound like the asshole. People wish me a happy holiday thinking they are covering all the bases when they really are not. Go ahead and say I'm overreacting but let's face it, it took a long time for the U.S. to get from Merry Christmas to Happy Holidays because the U.S. couldn't even account for Jewish individuals for however long.

Here is how much I don't give a shit about holidays: I was at Tilt a Kilt with a friend of mine, drinking and checking out the chicks serving us when I turned to him and said "I really wanted to say 'let's take off the Santa hats because Christmas is over.'" This was the other day and Christmas is still weeks away.

I may not agree with everything Hitchens believed, like his backing of George W. Bush or the war in Iraq, but I am grateful for his willingness to be outspoken about his atheism. I don't know how many of us are out there but we are still treated like our beliefs don't matter. But fuck us if we don't honor, tolerate, and respect the religious.

Thank you, Christopher. I will miss you.