Not Even Obligatory
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, a time when we are all supposed to sit around, shove as much food as possible into our faces, and talk about what we are grateful for. I actually like this holiday (though I'm really glad that no one on my Facebook feed did that 30 days of Gratitude bullshit like last year; we are meant to be grateful every day and NO1CURR so shut up about it). See that parenthetical aside? Notice how I just created my own snare and was caught by it? Because I'm going to write about things I'm grateful for the day before Thanksgiving.
I am grateful that Johan waited for me before he died, that he came out and lay under his water bottles so I'd see him. I'm so happy I was there with him when it happened, even though it tore me up inside and I was inconsolable and, at times, incomprehensible (see J, the Bat, and my mother for proof). I would have hated it if he'd died whilst being boarded at the vet because I would spend the rest of my life assuming he thought I took him there because I didn't want him anymore and didn't care if he died with strangers. Even though he was a guinea pig with a tiny brain and wouldn't have thought that all, really. I'm just so grateful that I was there with him and that he came out to say goodbye to me. I am also grateful to the Bat for letting me bury Johan in one of the gardens I planted at the house. I absolutely could not just throw my precious little pigglepants into the dumpster.
I am grateful that I am living in my apartment with my cat. I like living on my own and this place is perfect for me even if it is in the semi ghetto, the hot water is iffy, and my kitchen drawer broke. It's the right size and has a nice set up, and just feels right. I have my privacy again. I have all the alone time that I need. It's like having my teenage bedroom back only this time I can put a lock on the door and no one can come in unless I say so.
I am grateful for my friends, old and new. I have old ones, like Austin, someone I've known for over a decade and with whom I still have asinine text conversations with. Newer ones, like Tits, who helped me out so much when I was moving from Ohio to Texas and who can make me laugh until I think I'm going to pee. Brand new ones like Spectero, who is as awkward and socially self-doubtful as myself, and Bruce, who has invited me to Thanksgiving with him, his husband, and their friends. I have so many friends that love me and care for me and I'm happy to say that there are too many to list without feeling bad about leaving them out.
I am grateful that J and I are friends again and that I got to visit him in Ohio. Talking again has lifted a tremendous amount of weight off of us both and we are both eternally grateful that we accidentally bumped into one another online. We had a great time visiting and keep in touch regularly. If you've read this blog you'll know that our not talking, that those two years of silence just killed me. I have always been grateful to know J and I'm over the moon that he is my friend again.
I am grateful for my family, my good health, my employment and just so much. This has been an interesting year and although there are some things I wish I could change, I try to just focus on the good parts, like Bubbles returning to her normal self and getting my favorite parking spot. No matter how big or small, I know that I'm a lucky girl and that I have so, so much to be thankful for.
End blog post full of feels. Gobble Gobble.